Around the Bay - 2012 edition

Today was the race opener of the season - Around the Bay (AtB) in Hamilton. I actually really like this race, despite the tone that this post may end up taking :). It is well organized and has a few nice special touches: the organizers communicate well, allow bib transfers, have great race shirts, race day goes off without a hitch every time (the 118 years of experience really shows!), the km markers have inspiring/interesting quotes all along the way, the route is challenging but still goes by pretty quickly, and it's a 30km distance race, of which there aren't very many (two in Toronto) and make for a great distance for those training for fulls but also to push yourself beyond the half without having to do that many fulls. And hands-down the best part of the race (no, it's not Valley Inn Road (VIR), a steep hill at km 26), is turning the corner and down the ramp to, in full Olympic style, sprint to the finish line, IN Copps Coliseum.

So. On to my debrief on the race.

I did not anticipate racing this and sort of got taken in by the initial pace and followed along. The first 10km was really congested so I just sort of made my way across and then thought I could up the ante so increased my speed for the next 6-7 kms. I was keeping consistent pacing so I wanted to see if I could keep that up, which became my real goal, as that is the biggest race challenge I have. Not that I was trying to get a negative split on the AtB route with the hills in the 2nd half, but to try to stay consistent. Around 21km though, my breathing changed and I was really nauseous. I figured I was pushing it too hard and it was lactic acid build-up so I threw in a slightly longer walk break. It seemed to work but by 23km, I was already slowing down my pace and could not dig deep to push through. I kept CRAVING water by now and stopped at 3 water stations (2 real ones and 1 makeshift one) between km 23 and the finish to refill both my bottles. I wanted nothing to do with Gatorade. And I think this is what did me in (as it did at Midsummer Night's)*. Km 25 to the end was a wash. I gave VIR a half assed effort. I walked every 3 minutes during km 27 and 28 as I didn't know if I was going to throw up. I managed to finish strong though by just gritting my teeth and getting her done and actually SPRINTED to the finish line to get under 2:55 (2:54:58 on my Garmin!), a PERSONAL BEST!

So why did I feel so defeated post race? I mean, a beautiful day, a PB, that should make me happy, right?... But it's because my physical body actually felt strong and should have gotten me in in much better shape for the last 5km. It's because something happened physiologically that made it so unenjoyable - and not enjoying running or racing is not something I ever want. It's because it really shook up my confidence for Ottawa - wondering if I've got it in me to do the full in late May with the weather we're having - and I don't want to be dealing with self-doubt when really what I'm doing is a major accomplishment no matter what. It's because my chip time was a minute off my Garmin time (so my official result is 2:55:46) which made no sense to me since it was turned on only when I crossed the start and recorded accurate distance without any disruptions in satelite or time along the way).

Anyway, all difficult things to admit feeling upset about because it feels ungrateful and not authentic to why I do this. It is also all self-driven and unnecessary! But I'm living my yoga by practicing satya (truth) and trying to resolve these feelings for myself. And by doing so honestly, I am able to bring the perspective of gratitude back into the picture. My body got me through 30km. I achieved a PB (and shaved 5 minutes off my course time for AtB). It was a beautiful day and allowed me a taste of what to prepare for for Ottawa. It is showing me that progress is slow and while I miss my speed of days past, with proper training, patience, and compassion towards myself, I'll achieve it.



*What I think happened to me and definitely something I need to play with STAT to find the right electrolyte balance is hyponatremia. I wasn't overhydrated BEFORE but I think on course, I dillute my sodium levels to dangerously low levels by drinking too much water. Aside from the on course issues today, post-run cramping, nausea, and headache lasted 45 minutes. http://www.runnersworld.com/article/0,7120,s6-242-302--8785-0,00.html